Decaf Chats

Hello! How is everyone doing?? I got my second Moderna vaccine yesterday so I’ve pretty much just been sleeping all day. I feel so lucky and grateful to be able to get the vaccine and continue to be amazed by the innovation we’re all so lucky to have access to within the modern health care world.

I just wanted to do a little catch up since it’s been a while! I feel like this year has not only gone by so fast but also at points really slow. It’s been hard to stay in the present and focus on the good that is happening right now. I feel like there is so much to do, and at the same time it feels like nothing is going on. Is anyone else going through this as well?

While I have loved working from home, there have definitely been some ups and downs to the transition. My company has been going through some changes recently that have made it hard to stay motivated and on top of all the projects happening. It feels like as soon as I’ve completed a project, they have decided to massively change our process and I have to go back and start again. I’ve worked at this company for 5 years and while it has presented wonderful opportunities, I’m starting to wonder if my time at this company is nearing its end.

We all know the saying “change is constant” but it never gets easier, does it? I feel there are some big changes coming up in my life, most of them will be initiated by me. I feel it’s time to start seeing what other opportunities are out there, to push myself again, and find a place where I’m excited to show up and work hard. I feel like I’ve lost that motivation at my job recently and I don’t want to accept that as a ‘new norm.’ While I’m afraid of all of the unknowns that come with a new job, I think it’s starting to get to that time where I take a leap. I’m in my early 30s and it feels like if I don’t make a change now, I’ll be looking back in 5 years wondering why I didn’t grow more.

I’ve found that I have so much I want to do, but it all feels like too much so instead I waste my time scrolling Instagram, reading blog posts about other people being successful and productive, and watching hours and hours of TV. I know the last year has been hard for all of us in various ways, and I think for me it’s led to more fear and anxiety about what I’m doing in life and why.

I’ll be moving in a few months (I’ll be sure to bring you along for that ride because I want to document that process!) and once I’m done with that I’m hoping I can devote more time to looking for new opportunities in my life. It’s really easy to avoid life, but it takes courage and grit to face life head on. I’m hoping to implement little things into my daily/weekly life over the next few months to get me to a better place. A place where I feel I’m excited for change and can take on the unknown. A place where I want to work hard and let go of fear. A place where I have a reason to get out of bed every morning. No one can make us change, no article, no self help book, no motivational speaker can make us into who we want to become – you have to do the work.

Photo by Daria Shevtsova on

I get in ruts where I feel like I have to research, and study and figure out the best way to tackle something new, but I have to realize that the best way to tackle something new is to just do it! Even with this blog, I struggle just writing, just posting, because I feel like I have to have the right images and say the right things. I’ll never get better at this if I don’t just keep doing it though!

Well, this was not the catch up post that I had planned on writing, but that’s the beauty of going with the flow, right??

I hope everyone has been having a good week so far! Are there any little things you add to your daily/weekly routine that help keep you motivated and productive? Let me know!


  1. A friend recently shared a mantra she uses during times of change, inspired by Buddhist teachings: “Without impermanence, growth cannot occur.” It is so easy for momentum to keep us stuck in ruts, even when we recognize that we’re stuck. I love your point that it takes courage and grit to face life head on. It sounds like you’re ready for growth, which is a good mindset to have as you enter this period of change. Great things are just around the corner. 🙂

    • I love this quote! I’ll have to write it down in a place where I can see it every day – thank you for sharing! I appreciate the reminder that it’s important to be in the right mindset for growth to happen 🙂

  2. From my vantage point as being a wise old woman of 66, I could tell you about a lot of times I have felt the same over the years, even to this very moment. I will just tell you what I have finally learned to tell myself at these times and many others, too. Don’t be too hard on yourself. You’ll rise out of your funk when you’re ready.

    One’s time on earth is still limited, of course, but among the many expressions and affirmations I have been scrolling through, mostly on FB, I have found several that essentially say that time is only wasted if you’re not doing something you enjoy. Come to think of it, there’s a commercial featuring Mindy Kaling (someone of your generation with whom I’m not extremely familiar) in a vignette followed by other celebrities all asking questions related to cliches like this i.e. questioning their veracity.

  3. @hbsuefred – this is really sweet, thank you for the reminder:) I feel like this must be a lesson we have to learn countless times through the ups and downs of life. Even when we think we have learned how to deal with change or the ebbs and flows of life, it hits hard again. I think the next few months will be me learning how to ride the waves and focus on the good ❤

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